"Marriage never went out of fashion, certainly among South Asians, though its forms, culture, and politics were never static. Learning to Love gives us a fine grained narration of fluid, changing practices and negotiations shaping 'arranged marriage' and intimacy through the voices of two generations of British Indians. Raksha Pande uncovers their making of culture, tradition, choice, modernity, and claims to citizenship contesting the stereotypes that prevail in the 'west'."
Rajni Palriwala, co-editor of Marrying in South Asia: Shifting Concepts, Changing Practices in a Globalising World
"Amidst rising anti-immigrant sentiment, Learning to Love is a welcome intervention into entrenched, nationalist discourses of 'arranged marriage' that present it as anachronistic and utterly different from love marriage. Pande highlights the hopes and strategies of British-Indians, young and old, who talk of 'rishta,' matchmaking, intergenerational negotiation, modernity, and falling in love with the right person. A breath of fresh air!"
Meena Khandelwal, author of Women in Ochre Robes
"Theoretically robust, lucid in style, and presented in an accessible manner. It is a welcome addition to the literature on marriage and spousal selection in general and diasporic marriages in particular. It will be of interest to scholars in the domain of geography, social anthropology, sociology, and gender studies working on questions of diaspora, marriage migration, and (informal) citizenship and anyone interested in the theme of marriage and transnational lives."
Gender, Place & Culture
